Monday, February 8, 2010

My Weekend in Review

I don't exactly know how to start this post, since the last post was really upsetting to me.

My grandmother passed away early Friday morning after being in hospice since December.

I haven't cried. I've barely thought about it.
Not because I don't care. It's because I refuse to believe it happened.

My Lala was so full of life. I can still remember the way she laughed. The way she smiled. I always remembered her with a cigarette in her hand, and the way she called my mom "Susie" in that thick accent.

It's hard to imagine that someone that full of life could be gone. It's so hard for me. It's even worse for the rest of my family.

My mom has been stoic, but deep down I know that she is really distressed. I'm worried about my Grandfather, because my Lala was his entire life.

It feels like the core of our family is gone, and now we're aimless. We used to always go to Lala's house whenever we would go to Tennessee. Now what? Where do we go when my grandpa doesn't have it?

On top of that, we've had to do a lot with electronics this weekend.

I had to go get a new laptop. So now I have this:
I also had to get a new phone, so I got this one:It's the Samsung Rogue. I also bought screen protectors and a pink case to protect the phone.
I had to pay $132 out of pocket for it all. Which really sucked.

But that was my weekend.

Oh, and I updated TheJerryFink.com. So make sure you check it out.

12 comments:

Amander said...

It's really hard when a strong matriarch or patriarch pass away. It defintiely shifts the family. Thoughts are with you.

Kristina P. said...

Lee, I'm really sorry about your grandmother. I think that many times we don't think it will be that hard, since they are older anyway, but it's always such a loss.

Grand Pooba said...

Oh I am so so sorry about your grandma! It takes time to let reality set in, it will hit you when you least expect it.

Anonymous said...

I'm so sorry that your grandmother passed away. *hugs* When my grandfather passed away I cried even though I'd only ever been around him twice in my life so I can't imagine what you're going through. :(

Erin said...

I'm really sorry Lee. Maybe you could write in a journal (or start a blog) where you write about the good times you had with her and the cute and fun things you remember about her. That could even help with the healing process a bit.

Wendyburd1 said...

Losing a grandparent is so hard

Jillene said...

I still have a really hard time with the passing of my grandma and she died almost 7 years ago. It's never easy to lose a loved one. I'm so sorry Lee. I really hope that you find peace and comfort at this trying time.

Bobby G said...

Any death is hard, make sure you take the time to grieve when you need to, because holding it in is all bad! You need to talk you know how to get a hold of me! xoxoxo

Sheri, RN said...

::hugs:: I know it is hard, but grieve on your own time just don't try holding it all in because it will break :(

Kimmy said...

I'm so sorry for your loss. My grandma passed away in June and I still haven't really grieved. I have a hard time believing it also. Christmas this year would have been really hard but because it was at our house this year, I guess it kept my mind preoccupied.....thank goodness!

Hang in there! *hugs*

Mrs. M said...

Sorry things are so tough for you right now! Thinking of you!!

Anonymous said...

It's not easy losing anyone and sometimes the dynamics of the family do change. Nothing has been the same for me since my grandfather died in 2005. When my grandmother passes (she's 86) it will all come crashing down. Hang in there! I won't lie and tell you the pain will go away but it will get a little easier!

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