Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Fast-Food Etiquette

I never thought I'd have to do a post about fast-food etiquette.
But APPARENTLY I do.
Thanks to Daniel.
Who is inconsiderate and needs to get punched in the balls a FOURTH TIME.
(Yes, I did punch him in the balls 3 times.)
(No, I'm not sorry.)

Today I had the mega munchies for some reason.
We all have those days where the 500 pound man inside of us rears his ugly head.
First I got two tacos at Del Taco.
And let me stop right there. Has anyone ever actually thought about what Del Taco means?
I was in the car with Melora and Daniel and looked up at the sign, and something clicked in my head.
"HEY. HEY. WAIT. DEL TACO MEANS "OF THE TACO"."
Yep, you heard me right. Del Taco means "Of the taco".
But I looked it up, and it used to be called Casa Del Taco, so House of the Taco.
But Of The Taco just sounds stupid.
So forgive me for actually paying attention in spanish class.
"Where do you want to eat today?" "Of the taco." "Where?" "Of the taco." "I DON'T KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS.

Back to my original Fast-Food Etiquette post. After Of The Taco, we went to A&W/Long John Silvers. (They're a combined restaurant.)(That's a weird combination.)(I like parentheses).
Daniel ordered chili fries and an orange swirl drink. Got it two seconds after he ordered.
Melora ordered the SAME THING AS ME, got it before she even left the register paying.
I had to wait almost 10 MINUTES for my food.
The worst part? I saw her make it. I then saw her push it to the side and let it sit there.
Getting cold.
I was pissed. I didn't need cold fried shrimp with a cold hamburger.
So I turned to Daniel, who was next to me, and told him I was getting "effing angry" because my food was sitting there and she was just "standing there". Literally, almost 10 minutes my food just sat there.
And so what did Daniel do? Made a face, threw his hands in the air, and walked away.
So then he made me look like an ass for complaining in front of everyone else.
I confronted him at the table, and he told me that he didn't like me "loudly complaining about the woman behind the counter, where she could obviously hear me."
A.) She could not hear me. The whirring of the machines in the restaurant made that impossible.
B.) So what if she could (she couldn't)? She couldn't touch my food, because I was watching her. And she was making MY FOOD cold. The food that I PAID for to be WARM for me to eat.
C.) If my food had been much colder, I would've had to throw it out. I'd rather she get her feelings hurt because she was being stupid and not paying attention than my food get ruined. (She was literally STANDING THERE).

He told me that they were obviously understaffed and I shouldn't have done what I did. I complained to my friend about sh*tty service. Oh man I must be going to hell now.
What's worse is I saw someone working behind the counter ON HIS CELLPHONE THE WHOLE TIME. If you're so "understaffed", don't chit-chat during your shift!

I came home and told my mom the story, and first she agreed with me. She said that I had the right to be angry, because if I pay for my food, I should get it fresh and not stone-cold.
Then she said that Daniel was a sissy because a real man would have gone up there and said something FOR ME.
I don't necessarily agree with that, but I do agree that calling attention to me being "rude" was rude in itself. I stood there watching my food get cold, which is infuriating, and he couldn't give two craps. He was more concerned about the service worker that wasn't doing her job getting her feelings hurt.

What would you do if you were in this situation?

So you know what? I'm writing the rules of Fast-Food Etiquette that I plan to live by.
1) If your food is cold when you get it back, say something. And if they take it back, watch them make it. Because no one wants spit in their food, but no one deserves cold food.
2) If your friend is a dick named Daniel and he throws a fit over you getting angry over cold food, hit him in the balls, it's only fair.
3) If your food is cold and you're too afraid to say anything, punch Daniel in the balls.
4) Hit Daniel in the balls.
5) Daniel scrotum pain.
I think you get the overall gist of my list.

I did learn something today, though. Fast-food etiquette can separate your real friends from people like DANIEL.
Who, btw, got a girlfriend RANDOMLY, wouldn't tell me her name or ANYTHING about her, and proceeded to tell someone else about her RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME.
God, I wish I could rig something to just permanently hit him in the testicles.

----------
One of my super-duper white friends wanted advice on him dating a black girl, because his family would apparently throw a ship-fit (think Titanic and icebergs) if he decided to.
I gave him my genius opinion.

Lee says:
black is black
white is white
if she cuts herself, and you cut yourself, and you smoosh blood together, then you won't get sick. she's just a human.
Seth says:
XD Lee i love the way you put it
Lee says:
lol, I realized that what i said wasn't normal and sent it to someone else going "wtf did i just tell him? did i tell him to do a blood pact?"

I know, I'm a genius. I should write a book.

15 comments:

heyLyss09 said...

I ALWAYS make comments out loud when someone in a position of "service" is being rude or totally inconsiderate. It drives my guy and friends nuts, but I think they deserve to hear it. You're paying for the food and essentially part of their pay check.

k8lynr said...

don't you just love translating random things from spanish to english? it's fun, and often entertaining (hence the del taco incident).

fast food can be ridiculous, so don't feel bad about complaining, especially if you saw someone just standing there with their cell phone. they are getting paid to do something.

and i love the etiquette rules. fun stuff.

-kate

Yaya said...

Girl, I freaking love you and your boobs. I mean, uh, you.
Sorry I've had too many blue hawaiin martinis and your blog post was slurring in my brain.

But what I do know is I love your blog. And when the heck are you gonna make my blog 3 columns!?

Love you!

Kristina P. said...

I will go ahead and run those rules pass the etiquette message board I'm a member of, and let you know what they think. :)

Sheri said...

I would have gone back up there and complained - to the manager. If they didn't do anything I would have gotten a number to talk to someone higher up (or gone on the A&W or Long John Silver website and e-mailed or called them up about the dining experience. Actually, you should do that - right now. You will probably end up getting a few free meals even. I've done this to a few places that haven't given me the right order or had craptastic service too. Best thing I got out of it? $50 from Fazolli's because they gave me my sandwich with tomatoes on it 3 times after I said I can't eat them! Muahahha!

Sarah said...

Laughed out lout many times throughout this entry...and no, you were not wrong about the food. I wish I could hit Daniel in the funbags :)

Carmen said...

Taking Spanish definitely leads to some good times! And funny discoveries. Sorry to hear that you had sucky service at the other place :(

Erin said...

I totally would have WANTED to complain, but I'm a wussy so I probably wouldn't have done anything.

(And I like parentheses too.)

Wendyburd1 said...

You totally should have complained and had them remake your food FRESH. I don't take that crap anymore, not since I WAS a waitress. I know how hard it can be so good service or someone TRYING, I reward them. People just being lame or not caring, forget it, I will not take crappy food because you don't wanna work at Taco Bell, QUIT THEN!! Never had Del taco.

LaurieJ said...

The passive aggresive in me just likes to stand there and complain loudly without actually having to confront. Got that from my mom.
And Of the Taco strawberry shakes call my name!

Liz said...

I very rarely have bad experiences in restaurant. But the few we have had the manager smoothed things over. That's what they are paid to do. The little workers making $6/hour don't really care. But I definitely believe that you should get what you paid for. My husband, in this situation, would have used some hospital analogy. Like... how would you like it if you came to our hospital for a CT scan and I just left you out in the hallway for an hour and walked by you and ignored you while you were sick as a dog. It usually wakes people up to their poor work ethics.

Grand Pooba said...

Haha! This post made me laugh, giggle, chuckle and then laugh again! Yes, you should write a book!

And I agree about the your cold food sitting there for 10 minutes, I would have been furious!

Glad you kicked Daniel in the balls, do it one more time for me would'ya?

heyLyss09 said...

I love your new layout by the way! If you could possibly tell me how to make my text area and header wider, I would love you forever. =)

Bobby G said...

Your mom is RIGHT! He shouldve been at the counter, lettin them know its food time! Chivalry is dead, boys today dont know SHIT! PS Punching a boy in the balls is against all rules. If a girl punches me in the balls she can get punched in the face. She crossed a line and she knows it!

Anonymous said...

fast food can be ridiculous, so don't feel bad about complaining, especially if you saw someone just standing there with their cell phone. they are getting paid to do something.
Cheers!

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